...You might be a Tchadian

If when pregnant the only thing you really crave is dried fish.
If your idea of clean is a well swept dirt yard.
If when the temperature falls below 80 degrees you dust off your parka.
If you've ever traveled to the big city on top of a loaded dump truck.
If you've ever sold a chicken to pay your medical bill.
If you've ever ridden bareback on a cow.
If you refuse to take your horse into the river for fear he'll become a hippo.
If you've ever had to cut a fishing trip short because you got bit in the butt by a hippo.
If you've ever given birth in a rice field.
If you've ever been evacuated to the hospital on a motorcycle.
If you've ever tried to deliver a baby who came out hand first.
If your mama's ever slapped you for crying during birth pains.
If you've ever fixed a leaky pipe with an inner tube.
If you've ever fallen out of a mango tree while 8 months pregnant.
If your mom "potty trained" you by resting you on her legs to let you poop on the ground.
If your dad took multiple wives to have more workers for his rice field.
If you've ever done surgery without a high school diploma.
If you drink hot tea when it's 130 degrees out.
If you speak more than five obscure languages.
If you've never opened a car door before.
If you've ever thought a cement mixer was an airplane.
If you've ever opened a bottle of Coke with your teeth.
If it's ever taken you 2 days to travel 42 km.
If you've ever repaired a flat tire with needle and thread.
If you've ever packed a car rack higher than the car itself.
If you've ever carried more than your body weight balanced on your head.
If you've ever strapped a baby to your back.
If you fill up your gas tank using an old wine bottle filled at the side of the road.
If you grow gourds on the roof of your house.
If you've ever plowed a field by hand while talking on a cell phone.
If you've ever brought your child to church naked.
If you've ever ridden a motorcycle wearing a turban with an eyeshade over your mouth.
If you've ever paid tithe at church with a goat.
If no one stares when you dress your baby boy in hot pink.
If you think nothing of male soldiers walking down the street holding hands.
If you've never seen a guy and girl hold hands in public.
If you think nothing of seeing a woman's breasts but are scandalized by her naked knees.
If you've ever attended class under a mango tree.
If you've ever broken your arm falling off an ox cart.
If you know more than one person who's been gored by a bull.
If you've ever been thrown in prison for casting a spell on someone.
If you've ever sued someone for killing your pig.
If you've ever killed a rat by stepping on it.
If you've ever eaten a bat.
If you've ever fixed a radiator with chewing gum.
If when your child has a sore throat you cut his uvula.
If you feel like an honored guest when you're served soda pop.
If you've ever shared the highway with a herd of longhorns.
If you think all white people look alike.